I am already back in the thick of it at work. As if BlogHer09 never happened. Grateful I have a really good memory because I had a better time than I even imagined. Met awesome people, learned a few new things, shared ideas, and then some.So without further delay….

I have never really been plugged into the BlogHer community. I joined s few years ago because I thought that connecting with other women bloggers would be enriching, both personally and professionally. But…as always, life got in the way and I never took the time to see what the network had to offer. Thus, I was stunned when Elisa sent me an email (enter twitter ID) inviting me to participate in the Leadership: Hope and Change in Action panel discussion at this year’s conference in Chicago. I didn’t even know that I was on their radar.

My first reaction – apprehension! I have a bit of stage fright that often affects my decisions whether or not to accept speaking engagements (I have gotten better over the years). But…after some consideration I jumped at the chance to meet other community activists who use their blogs (and other social media tools) to affect change in their communities. Good stuff, right?!

So, connect I did! I met so many awe-inspiring women this weekend! I was especially excited to meet some people I have had considerable online contact with over the last couple years.

So here are my Top 5s of BlogHer09! What were yours?

(no particular order)

Top 5 Memorable Moments

1. Birds of a Feather LGBTQ Style

2. Finally meeting @MoreThanMommy @FunkyBrownChick and @NYCityMama

3. QueerBrunch at West Egg with @lesbiandad @LizaWasHere and @msbri

4. Ilene Chaiken proclaiming the buying power of the lesbian community from center stage (advertisers get with the program)

5. Queerosphere Party at Crimson Lounge (cough cough)

Top 5 Flops

1. Walking out on Ilene Chaiken to speak on Hope and Change panel

2. MommyBlogger hijack (non-MB) LifeBlogging Session

3. Dial Up…err, I mean Hotel WiFi

4. Not enough time to chat with everyone I wanted to – quality time and conferences do not mesh well

5. Double Booking of Hope and Change in Action AND Women of Color and Marketing panels

Top 5 Kleenex SOS

1. QueerBloggers Panel – the very best of what it means to be a part of our community

2. DaddyBlogger Keynote…not a dry eye in the house

3. International Activist Scholarship Winners – real women real change

4. Bubbles at the L Room Party

5. the practically orgasmic massage at the Friday night cocktail party

Top 5 Parties

1. Queersphere @ Crimson (Hotel Sax)

2. Seaman Party in Room L

3. Friday Night Cocktail Reception (massages were divine)

4. Blogalicious (so I heard….but never made it)

5. EA @ House of Blues

Top 5 Laughing Til It Hurts

1. quote – “It’s ok if you are straight, but if you don’t twitter…i’ve got to go!”

2. Mommy’s partying 80s style (what a flashback)

3. Deb on the Rocks @ Humor Panel

4. The vibrator heist (thought someone was going to get trampled to death)

5. Smackdown at BowlHer @ Lucky Strikes

On a sidenote: I have never been so pampered in my life! Pedicures, massages, fantastic food, open bar, ….and the list goes on! The BlogHer team went above and beyond in making this event exciting and accessible. Personally, they helped me get there – way above the call of duty! My roommate was able to secure a sponsor for the room, so my only real expense was the kennel for Samson and a little bit of spending money.

The conference was such a goldmine for new post ideas and projects. Despite the three-day whirlwind, I did have some time to reflect on the nature and status of The Diversity Projekt. I am no longer taking on new clients and have referred most of my old clients to trusted consultants in my network. Therefore, how will TDP adapt to my new life circumstances? Stay tuned for that post! I can say though that I am finally going to try out some new tools – particularly video. I am also re-launching Philadelphia Speaks and am working out the specifics of a monthly forum for activists in developing nations – I met four amazing women this weekend and want to lend a spot on TDP for them to be heard. Their stories are inspiring and humbling!

Thoughts for next year – There needs to be more balance to help represent and speak to the diversity of women who attend. This year’s conference lacked balance. I realize that many conferences are driven my supply and demand, particularly when it comes to sponsorships. Nevertheless, the conference was overwhelmingly dominated by the “MommyBlogger” (MBs) contingent – panels, company’s at expo, parties, etc. The vast majority of swag speaks to this niche – not any of those I often find myself in. Most breakout sessions had two panels for MBs, while the social change and women of color panels conflicted on the schedule. Mind you all three of us on the social justice panel were women of color. There were no exhibitors who really spoke to me as a lesbian or as a woman of color. Yes, we do laundry, use hair and skin care products, but there are also a host of other products applicable that may be outside of the MB frame of reference.

Also, the panel discussions that were not specifically geared towards MB’s were still dominated by topics most relevant to their niche – sponsors, monetization, etc. Even the one discussion that was specifically geared towards non-MBs was hijacked. Several MB apologists dominated the discussion and prevented us from having some discussions on how we, as Non-MBs, could support each other better. At times I really wondered where and how I as a queer woman of color really fit into the conference format.

If diversity and inclusion are the desired and intended goals, we need to be more mindful to speak to women and women’s issues, concerns, desires, etc. across the entire spectrum. Focusing almost exclusively on one niche to the exclusion of another, sends the wrong message. It makes assumptions about value that I am not entirely comfortable with. Is that really the messsage we want to send? Is alienating each other really the router we want to take?

So, I guess what I am trying to say is:

1. tone down the swag

2. work towards more diversity and balance

3. can’t wait to go to NYC!

Just some thoughts…….